Puppies and printers and scammers, oh MY!

Do you have those days when you feel like you did NOTHING at all, but you're tired anyway? Today was one of those days. And so that I don't feel like a total loser, I decided I'd post my accomplishments, no matter how small.

And off we go

I got my kids fed and dressed. Hey, that's quite the accomplishment here, where the Dirty Laundry girls would like every day to be Pajama Day.

I took this sweet puppy outside humpteen times to go potty, and I fixed his special meals of puppy food and formula. He's one month old today, you see. Oh, and also I can't stop taking pictures of him. Like a grillion.

Let's see, what else? Oh, I called Lexmark regarding a problem I'm having with my color ink cartridge, and surprise of all surprises? THEY ARE SENDING ME A NEW CARTRIDGE. You don't see that kind of customer service much these days! So YAY, Lexmark.

Called scammer Loral Langmeier to argue about a charge to my account. I may write an entire post about this tomorrow. Yeah, I will, so check back. I know, I haven't been so consistent with the writing of the posts, but just check back - I'm trying to do better.

Hey, the puppy just deleted my entire post. Thank goodness for Auto Save!

I sorted my tax receipts - until this afternoon, everything was crammed into one folder. Next step will be entering them into spreadsheets.

Made and/or received several business calls. Have I told y'all lately that we love our business? Ask me about it.

Oh yeah, and I also educated my children. Found a great typing site through a friend's blog. Printed out worksheets, introduced new exercises. It was a GREAT school day.

Did I mention taking a grillion pictures of the puppy? Oh, and wrote a blog post for the first time in 87 years. I guess I wasn't such a slacker after all.

Carte Blanche

Wow, it's been over a month since I've posted.

You know what? With Twitter and Facebook around these days, it's just so easy to post a quick thought there, and never really get around to putting those thoughts together into a post.

Even today I'm just writing a quickie, to say HOW VERY MUCH I love my new 'do. I've returned to the Best Hairdresser I Ever Had, and I'm embarrassed that it's taken me this long.

Sherry was the first one who gave me layers, oh, like 25 years ago. Sherry was the first one to perm my hair, and the first to give me highlights too.

No, I don't perm my hair these days. My frizz phase passed in the early 90s.

Don't ask my why I left Sherry; I don't remember. I think it was an impulsive day when I couldn't get an appointment with her, and I just wandered away aimlessly.

I'm so ashamed.

But yesterday I returned to the Mother Ship, and all is right with the world. She said to me, "Can I have carte blanche?" And I said, "Go for it."

And she did.

And I'm happy.

But I don't have a photo yet, so you'll just have to wait.

Polly's Return

Hey, how come I just found Polly Pocket's black pump in my bed? I haven't seen that tramp around this house for MONTHS, and today I find her dadgum shoe in my bed?

I wanna know what the heck's been going on, y'all.

Standin' up for the Depot!

I thought I might present an alternative view to the Home Depot "controversy" in the news this week.

Big Daddy has been employed by Home Depot for over two years and we have found them to be a generous and fair employer. An employer with rules.

For the first few months that BD worked at HD, he wore whatever ball caps he chose. At some point, it was brought to BD's attention that he was to wear Home Depot-approved ball caps. So BD complied with his employer's dress code.

Until this month, all employees at HD had been allowed to wear shorts year-round. Effective October 1, they were notified that shorts would no longer be allowed until Spring. So my husband complied with his employer's dress code. He whines, but he complies. :)

We're well aware of the rule that prohibits personal buttons on the work apron. Heck, that sacred apron isn't even allowed out of the dang store! And the buttons? Home Depot buttons, baby. NASCAR buttons, FROM HOME DEPOT. Vendor buttons, FROM HOME DEPOT. Reward badges, FROM HOME DEPOT. I think you get my point.

Oh, and? BD reads WHATEVER he wants to in the break room, and that includes his Bible.

To be honest, y'all? I don't think it matters what the guy's dadgum button said. It could have said, "Kiss Me, I'm Irish!", "I Love My Wife!", or "Star Trek Forever," and it would have been out of compliance with the company's dress policy.

Are people seriously saying that because the button was patriotic or Christian that it should have been allowed, regardless of the rules? Seriously? It's not like it was a cross on a chain around his neck, or a yarmulke or some such religious icon. It was a ding dang pin-on button. And his boss told him to take it off. And he refused.

Insubordination is grounds for termination.

I'm just gonna say that I don't use my Christian beliefs or love for my country as an excuse to break rules. And I don't like it when other people do, either.

Breaking News

THIS JUST IN!

Britney Spears buys parakeet!

Seriously? People Magazine? Do we need to know this?

I just don't get it.

Today's Mantra

Today's Mantra:

She'll grow out of those boots soon and I won't have to cringe at what she wears them with.

And also? I know my participle is dangling...or some kind of grammar faux pas.

The Ride of Our Life

Contact me if you want to join us.

All Over The Place

So I've got a lot on my mind, and maybe putting it all down here will help me sort it out and make some sense of it. Whether you'll enjoy reading about it? Is debatable.

We're building a business, which is SO rewarding and stressful at the same time. We're involved with some of the most fabulous people we've ever met, as well as some of the most infuriating. God's prospering it though, so Yay, God!

I'm on a pretty strict eating program right now and getting GREAT weight loss results. Problem is? I'm getting oh, so bored with my eating choices. The supplements and foods keep me from craving lovely things like steak and chocolate, but still...there's only so much you can do with lean meat. Tired of chicken. Almost tired of salmon. Wah. The bright side? I did just figure out that I can have eggs, so YAY!

My dogs are old. I mean, like 14 and 15 years old. They've begun going potty all over the house and it REALLY stresses me out. Plus I think they have worms. And fleas. And we have fought such a diligent battles against those parasites that I'm upset by our failure. We haven't gone to the vet since getting their annual shots, and if we go now, he will certainly want to do "geriatric" blood work AGAIN, and DANG that's expensive.

We're planning a trip for later in the fall, and please see above re: elderly dogs. There's only one person in the world that I trust to dog sit for us, and if she's not available...AGH.

My oldest daughter has just been diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder, and while it's such a blessing to know the REASON for her behaviors, it's still exhausting to deal with at times.

Pretty sure my youngest daughter has some sort of Attention Deficit thingie, and her flightiness wears me out some days. Can not be still. Can't. Not an option. But we're working on getting an evaluation, so I'm looking forward to that.

Homeschool this year is like a giant chess match. We have one too few computers, and I haven't found our rhythm yet on who's where, and when. Pooh9 now has a computer in her room, so she's set. But the other two? Keeping them busy and focused has been a challenge so far.

I can't wait for those Christmas sales, so we can get one or two more computers. Of course, we'll have to move out the beds and stuff to fit it all in, but hey, whatever works.

We're going to a fantastic training for our business tomorrow, and am VERY excited. Woo Hoo!

And by the way, I know that my God will supply all my needs according to His riches in glory, and I know that I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. Because if it weren't for Him, what sense would anything make?

And on that note, y'all have a great weekend, because I intend to.

House Wanted

Scooter: Momma, every morning when you wake up, you burp.

Me: You lay in there and listen to me in the morning?

Scooter: (giggling) Yes ma'am.


Yeah, we definitely need a bigger house.

Churrrrrrrrrrrros

Is it wrong that I want to move into the Big Brother house just so I can have the Churros?

Dang, I love me some Churros!

Oh, and also? Michelle's hair is JACKED ON UP. Seriously, I wish Jordan or even Natalie would tie her down and do something with that crooked parted, greasy mess.

And send me some Churros while they're at it.

Fear

I saw this quote today on Facebook:

Confront your fear HEAD ON!
Take the sting out of it, then start acting to eliminate it!

Nothing robs your energy as fast as FEAR!

More To Love - August 4

I'll admit it - I may be addicted to reality television. I'll watch anything once, and some ridiculous shows even more than once.

Tonight I'm watching More to Love on Fox, and I have a few thoughts to share.

Y'all, I'm a big girl. The smallest I've ever been is a Size 16. My wedding dress was an 18. And now? I'm not gonna tell you the size, but I'll tell ya this: I'm the largest I've ever been. Praise God, I'm losing weight again, but that's another post.

My point is this: No matter what my size has been, I just lived my life. These girls whine about their size CONSTANTLY. All the time. Non-stop. And come on - most of them are about a size 18, maybe a 20.

Shut up, you big honkin' babies!

Most of them could use a session with Clinton and Stacy from What Not to Wear, too, because OMG, they wear such unflattering clothes! Yeah, maybe weight isn't the reason you can't get a date. Maybe it's because you dress crappy.

Just a thought.

And finally? This guy comes off insincere to me. I hope I'm wrong, because I'd hate for him to just be playing games with all these basket cases.

What do you think?

Big honkin' jerks

You know what hacks me off?

Jerky people who lie - that's who hacks me off.

Seriously, isn't it sad when people lie about others, just to cover the fact that they themselves are big honkin' jerks?

Ugh.

Bad Timing

Happy Independence Day, all!

You know what I was just thinking? I REALLY wish that our forefathers had considered weather when they declared Independence Day.

It's sweaty out there, y'all.

I'm thinking March or October may have been a more moderate choice. But that's just me.

Please No.

Just saw on The Travel Channel that in Ecuador? They eat guinea pigs. It's like the national dish or something.

I kid you not.

That's just nine kinds of wrong, y'all.

The Bachelorette - June 1

I'm watching The Bachelorette tonight, but I'm not sure how much I'll write about it. I do like the guy who got the first date - Ed?

And you know what really hacks me off? The guys who interrupt other guys' conversations with Jillian. It's just RUDE, people!

And although I don't like Juan much, I don't get David's Deep Dark Hatred of the guy. David! Move on, Dude!

Tanner P is a Big Honkin' Freakin' Freak with his foot fetish, y'all. He needs to get on outta there!

I like Robby from Spring, Texas.

And also Sasha from Tiki Island, Texas! Hold up - she's sending him home? WAH.

Okay, so I like Wes too, but I'm about tired of his song, yo. He needs to write another one, seriously. No, no, no! STOP singing that dang song, Wes! Sing "Love Me Tender" or something, but I'm OVER "They say love, it don't come easAY HAY HAY HAY AY!"

More freaky foot stuff. Uhm...EW.

And unfortunately Dave has officially gone off his rocker.

It's Rose Ceremony time - who's going home tonight? Well I'll tell ya this - it looks TENSE in there! So two guys I don't recognize are going home, and I guess that says a bit about why they're going. I can't believe freaky foot guy is staying. I'll have to send my girls to bed early next week because I don't wanna have to explain the whole toe suckin' thing just yet.

What did you think about tonight's show?

Define unique, please.

My girls are going through all of their old birthday cards, Valentines and such. Tinkerbell is thrilled because she has 17 cards, and Pooh won't tell anyone how many she has.

Then Tink and Pooh realize that they have the same card. The kicker? The fronts of the identical cards read:

Grandaughter
You are beautiful
You are special
You are unique
You are loved.

Cracks me up.

The Bachelorette - May 25

I am WAY too disorganized and random to do any kind of formal recap or commentary, so it's random randomness from Random Town, people.

That's just how I roll.

The race to find Jillian? SO fun! I love that so far there's more to this show than muggin' down in the hot tub.

Love that Wes won the Vault Date with Jillian, and I don't get why the other guys don't like him. Sounds like they think he's there to further his music career, but I don't see that yet. Hope I don't. Cause I'd hate to have to dump one a my Texas boys.

And Brad? Is a tool. Whatever that means. I'm not a fan.

Another Texas boy gets a date - it's Jake, the commercial pilot from Dallas. Yep. And how cute is this guy with his little feelings and his corny western shirt?

P.S., when did Jillian turn into a Hot Tamale? Cause I knew she was cute and all, but tonight? She's smokin'.

Hello, impulsive kisser! How romantic is this guy?

Moving on to the basketball date, and I gotta say - Jillian? Lose the scarf. A trend is a trend, sweetie, but to play basketball? I can not co-sign that.

Cause I'm clearly a fashion icon.

Anyway.

Intermission while I play Farkle on Facebook.

Tanner P is a freakin' freak with the foot thing, and he needs to go home. Even if he is from Texas (isn't he?).

The guys voting for the person they'd like to see leave is awkward, but I see a twist coming...let's see. They choose Juan, but Jillian keeps him. Yawn.

Rose Time! I still don't know these guys' names, so I'll refrain from a play-by-play here. Except...Jessie and Sasha are safe and I like 'em both. David too, although I'm tired of him saying he wants to beat Juan's ass.

Let it go, David. Let it go.

So Naked Pool Jumper goes home, and so does the Brit. No surprises here.

What about you? Who are your favorites? What are your thoughts about this episode?

Talk amongst yourselves.

The Bachelorette - Apparently I'm watching it.

Hey, so I wasn't gonna watch The Bachelorette this season, but guess what? It's 1:00 in the dadgum morning and I'm sitting here watching it on the DVR.

There are SEVERAL Texas boys on this season, so maybe I'll just stick it out to see what happens to 'em. Yeah, that's it. Because I'm TOTALLY not addicted to reality TV. At all.

Some observations while I'm waiting on Jillian to kick some of 'em to the curb:

During the first introductions, Jillian said "Cool," and "Awesome," way too much. Seriously.

I'm really stressing over her white dress dragging in that water and gettin' all grody. I do, however, love that she kicked off her shoes and just padded around in bare feet half the night.

And speaking of feet, the guy who wanted to check out her feet creeped me out. He wasn't one of my Texas boys, was he? Lemme check the website. Tanner P...is from...oh crap, he's from Dallas. Well, Dallas or not, he's a freakin' freak and he needs to go.

One thing that runs through my mind, especially on the first couple of episodes, is How On Earth does she remember all the names? Are there cue cards or a teleprompter or something? Because I'm telling you right now - I COULD NOT remember all those names.

Okay, here's Jillian. She's gonna start giving out roses.

Jake - the pilot from Texas! One of my faves!

Wes - Woo Hoo! The country singer from Austin!

Michael - The break dancer - I like him.

Robert - Texas again!

Ed - He was one of the interlopers, wasn't he? But I liked him.

Reid - Another interloper! And I'm not so crazy about this one.

Simon - She must like accents, because he seemed strange, was hard to understand, and honestly? Not all that handsome either.

Kiptyn - What the heck kind of name is that? But I like him anyway.

Mike - Ew, low forehead. Reminds me of that lunatic CT on The Real World and all its spinoff Challenges. Ew.

Brian D - I like that little hillbilly.

Sasha - Texas again, and I liked his Serbian family in the intro clip.

Tanner P - Ew, I don't think she knows that he's a foot freak. I do like his jacket, though.

And now's when I start getting sad for the poor guys who aren't getting picked. Wah.

I liked the other Bryan and John H, but they're outta there.

There were 20 picks altogether, but some of 'em? Meh. Didn't care one way or the other.

I don't think I've ever watched a Bachelorette season all the way though, so we'll see what happens this year...

Did you watch the show tonight? What did you think?

Weekend Update

Hey y'all, here I am closing out the weekend.

It was a good one.

I can report that we drove 200 miles to Lake Somerville for a family reunion, and approximately 150 of those miles were in pouring rain. And I only spent about 5 minutes on anxiety. The rest was spent playing with my Blackberry, eating road trip snacks and stopping for tinkle breaks.

It was a nice drive.

I can report that I enjoyed visiting with my family immensely. I really, really love my aunts, uncles and cousins, for real. And it pains me that we only see each other once or twice a year. We meet at a park every summer and eat barbecue and say, "Y'all come see us!" but no one ever does. Maybe I'll make 2009/10 the year that the Dirty Laundry family actually goes and sees someone.

I'll keep you posted.

I can report that our return trip was also 200 miles. And that approximately 100 miles was in the pouring rain. I had no anxiety, Praise God! But we did increase the number of potty breaks. I have no idea why.

We stopped in West, Texas to buy kolaches, because that is what one does when driving through West, Texas. LOVE those kolaches!

Had sausage kolaches for dinner. Had fruit kolaches for breakfast this morning. Yum.

I'm done saying kolache. Promise.

I can report that this has been one of the best weekends in recent history, and the main reason? Peace of mind. Sweet, sweet peace of mind.

So many things that have been troubling me and weighing me down have been wiped out and it's magnificently fabulous. Are things perfect around here? HECK no. But they're oh, so much better and that's just what we need.

I hope yours was just as good.